Insomniac hits me..
My brain is working towards something maybe what's what I've been thinking about or maybe it's just lack of oxygen through the brain and suffocates the brain.
So, pardon me for my grammatical error or totally not making any sense kinda crap.
OR my totally unrelated entry per paragraph.
I'm just typing out what's on the mind.
Which maybe will help me to sleep..
These three months has proven to be a roller coaster ride for me.
I went through the phase of being someone whom might not be me or maybe is the real me.
It frightens me.
For the capacity of what I'm able to do whatever it takes to get what I want (or what I think I want at that moment)
Normally, I am not the type of person whom would forgive a small mistake easily, let alone a huge one.
But, I did.
Too many secrets and lies were heard, told and kept.
Yes, the path I chosen were extreme, self destructive and making a complete fool of myself.
And it went too far..
It reached to the point that I could not take it anymore.
To the point of me thinking, what's the point of fighting for it, going against and trying if by the end of the day, it is not the thing that's gonna make me happy.
I have did and done what I could..
I could not survive the pain that I had to go through..
I did not feel happy or to the very least, appreciated..
It was not going anywhere either..
So,
I gave up
Being a complete loser and coward..
But, hey, at least, I tried for it.
No more regrets afterward.. yeah?
All I need now is ME.
being happy
being ridiculous
being stupid
being totally random
being immature
being bubbly
being myself again
the old me
the one that I've been really missing all these while.
And what I'm doing now, is the right thing to do..
